Live To Tell

 I was not ready for the fall but I wasn't too blind to see the writing on the wall.   If you're seeing this post, it means that I made it through my 50th birthday skydive unscathed.   This time I ended up with a lady instructor.   I admit I was hoping I would see my original skydiver once more but it's likely he's not working there anymore.   I mean, it's been ten years since my last visit.

Hemingway the instructor was nice but most importantly she got me out of the skydive alive.   This time I opted not to take photos or a video since I did all that on my 40th.    I was on a plane with two other customers and their instructors as well as camera and video folks since they both paid for the extra services.   So unlike my first skydive, where I was the first to get out of the plane, this go around, I was the last to get out of the plane.  

I don't know if it's any better being last out of the plane than it was being first.   She tricked me in saying that once the initial divers did their dive, they would close the plane and go a little higher.   I instead found myself in the position once again of being pushed out of a moving plane.   I wasn't really ready but I had no choice but to proceed.   I guess she did say I could give a sign if I didn't want to do it and they would not do the jump but I wasn't going to go out like that.   

I was nervous as hell and screamed to high hell when I started plummeting from the sky but I did much better than my first dive.   When she tapped my shoulders, I did stretch out my hands to wave.    Then moments later when she tapped again, I did try to reach back for the parachute.   But I couldn't quite find it so she wound up opening it.    The freefall again was the scariest part but I was glad that all the harnesses were properly connected and I was still latched to the instructor.

The weather was perfect too.  It was cold but it was sunny and in the mid-50s.

Prior to my jump I even had an old friend call me for my birthday.   I don't remember if I spoke about him before in my blog but Mitch and I first met back in 2009 when I responded to an ad on Craigslist (when that used to be around) for a hookup.   I met him at his place and a one hour romp wound up being an all afternoon and late evening stay.   

Mitch and I wound up having a great rapport and he invited me to stay over for a BBQ lunch and later some dinner.   We fooled around again later on before I left for the evening.

We met a few more times over the next few years but I knew nothing more would come of it since he was married with two kids.   He was in an open relationship and his wife knew of me and she was the sweetest person too.   I even met his kids (a son and daughter) twice.

Sadly he fell into some trouble in 2014 when he was accused of soliciting a nude video from a teenager.   He didn't realize the boy was actually a teenager until it was too late.   And apparently the boy had other older men in his web but Mitch took the fall for all of them.    He wound up getting an 11 year prison sentence at a federal facility where he can't have any internet privileges and of course no freedom.   He's also now a registered sex offender so once he gets out of prison, he'll have to be cautious of where he lives.

So it was great to get his call on my birthday.   He timed it good too since I was waiting at the Skydive facility for my time to suit up.   He's missed out on a lot of events that have happened since he began his prison time in 2017.    He's missed five weddings and he couldn't be there when his wife died from cancer.   His daugther also has some health issues and both of his children he said has resentment against him for what happened.   I feel so bad for him.    He's over half way done with his sentence and is scheduled to be released in March 2028.

We've been writing each other letters over the last six years and his emotions are all over the place obviously.   I always feel bad when telling him about my issues because it can never compare to being locked up in prison.   I pray for him and also pray I never find myself in that situation.   He was 54 when he got convicted and sentenced and will be 65 when he gets out.   Crazy.

So life goes on.   It'll be almost three years since my Mom died.   I plan to light candles for both my parents around All Souls Day.   It's just amazing how our lives are just a small blip to the millions of years the world has existed.   That's why I remind myself to try to enjoy life while you can.   It really is too short.

50 Eve

 I got back from my trip to San Diego on Tuesday.   It was an enjoyable time even though I didn't make any profit at the casinos I visited.   Also unfortunately David and I did not meet.    He had a close family pet die the day before my trip and he basically said that he wasn't in the best frame of mind to meet.   You never know if people are telling the truth when they make last minute cancellations.   Life does happen of course even if it happens at funny times.    I know if I told Eugene about it, he'd say that David is lying.   I  know too that the window of opportunity to meet again is unlikely.    Also he will have to make the next move if that is to happen.   And if it's like all my past experiences with guys, that means that it won't happen.  

But besides the casinos I also checked out Old Town and attempted to visit Julian, CA which has a place called Julian Pie Company famous for their apple pies.    I drove to Julian mid-Saturday and there was such a large crowd in the town and there were no places to park so I wound up turning back around.   But thanks to the Internet, I was able to order a pie online that'll be delivered to my home just in time for my 50th birthday.   It's an almost $50 apple pie too with half of that going towards shipping.    Hope the pie is worth the hype.

I lucked out getting a four day rental at a decent price.   I was able to use a corporate discount which made quite the difference in price.   The best thing too is that I just had to pick up the car w/o having to deal with the rental agent.    It was smooth and seamless.   

I didn't miss the airport one bit.   On the plane trip going I was surrounded by a lounging person in front of me and some young idiots behind me that kept pulling on my seat and pushing against the lower part.   And I didn't get a row to myself either time.    I fucking hate people.  Economy Parking was not so much an economic choice, costing me $75 by the time I returned.   

But I'm so blessed that I was able to do the trip.

I'm also planning to do another Skydive on my actual birthday.   The last time I did one was on my 40th birthday.   How time flies.    I admit I'm feeling nervous about it but I'm hopeful that it'll be fine like the last one was.  Thanks to Covid, they now gave me the option to sign my life away online.   I'm still deciding if I want to jump out of a perfectly good plane or not.    If I don't I'll only be out $50.

Merry Gardener

 Dom learned about this vegetable called cucamelon when looking at plant seeds on Amazon.    The cucamelon is a small veggie that looks like a small cucumber but tastes like a lime.  Apparently they are the latest hot superfood.    They are said to be chock full of vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, and fiber.   Plus they are low in calories and can help lower the risk of heart attack and stroke.

That all sounds good.   So of course we bought some seeds from Amazon.   We had a late start planting them sometime mid-June.   We had them in little tiny paper planters and then Dom transferred the survivors to a larger pot.    The plants themselves get quite vine-y but we're about a month away from the first frost so wondered if we'd get to enjoy an actual cucamelon.    Two weeks back we started noticing the little yellow flowers.  And to our joy Dom took a look at them after coming home from work today and to his surprise he saw two young cucamelons popping up.   He called them our little babies...*LOL*.    Hopefully they can grow up in the next month in time for us to enjoy the unique taste.   We definitely plan on getting more seeds next year and starting a lot earlier.

San Diego Rebound

 With my work life finally on track, I decided it's about time I take a vacation.  Well actually Dom and I had a few mini-vacations here and there over the years.   But I mean my first real travel on a plane type vacation.   The title of the blog says it all.   I'm planning a trip to San Diego for my annual birthday trip (which hasn't happened in a few years).   It'll be my first time on a plane since my trip to San Francisco in September 2018.    While in San Francisco, I chatted on my "favorite" social media hookup site (LOL...sarcasm) with a cool gentleman that was visiting San Francisco for a conference.    I was there for my final work project with a previous employer.    David and I had a great connection and planned to meet up for a nightcap.   Unfortunately we couldn't get our schedules to mesh due to our work obligations.    But we wound up having something better.   We developed a great email friendship that has carried on for almost four years.

David is a married college professor that's based in, you guessed it, San Diego.    He and his wife have a great marriage minus the sex.   So we share that in common.   They also have an adopted nephew with special needs that they take care of.   He shared with me how they helped him get in a program that helps him with developing skills to be productive.   David himself has a side gig as a magazine merchandizer at various stores.  It helps keep him fit.

I shared with him my life stories of working at Amazon, the loss of my parents, Cybersecurity bootcamps, Salesforce trainings, and job hunting.   He was always there with encouragement to keep going no matter what.   So when I was thinking about where to travel, I knew I had to go to his hometown to finally meet David in person.

My last time in San Diego was in 2012 (a little over ten years ago) hanging out with a former acquaintance I nicknamed Magic Mike.   I stayed in the La Jolla neighborhood at that time.    This time though I plan to mostly reside at the Sycuan Casino Resort in the East County neighborhood though hopefully I can take some side excursions while there.   The plan is for David to meet me one evening at the Steakhouse at Sycuan.    He's also hoping we can hang out for a bit during one of my other days in town.   We may even have that nightcap.   We will see how that goes.

Overall I'm looking forward to enjoying some time traveling even if it does hurt my wallet short-term.   Who knows though?  Maybe I'll finally win a huge jackpot to pay for it all.   One can dream, right?

Farewell Papa

Around 2am EST on August 20, 2022, my Dad took his last breath in a hospital bed.   It was the conclusion of several months of repeated hospital and rehab visits.   My sisters and I had a meeting with the hospital staff (I did it over the phone since I wasn't in town) on Friday afternoon where we discussed the future care for my Dad.   Trina scheduled court time to seek legal guardianship for my Dad since he wasn't of sound mind and body.   That was scheduled for September 15th but alas is not needed anymore.

I had hoped I would get to see my Dad one last time and planned to travel today to see him.   I got the call from Trina around 1:40 CST time but I was asleep and didn't hear the phone.   I woke up around 4:30 AM and saw that she had called but didn't leave a message.   I knew then and there what had happened.   I visited anyway since I originally had a certification test planned for that day that I rescheduled to a facility in Michigan.   I didn't pass the test but it was my first attempt at a new Sales Cloud Certification so I wasn't phased.   I just wanted to be there with my sisters.   We three are the final line of our particular branch of the family but both my parents have (had) other siblings who have other lines that are continuing on so unless COVID, Monkeypox, floods, fires, and whatever else the world has in store for mankind wipes everyone out, the family name will continue.

Prior to my Dad dying, Tasha had shared a letter she wrote and read to my Dad prior to his passing.   It inspired me to write my own letter that I didn't get to share with him verbally but I plan to place a copy of it with him in his casket.   I thought I would share it here as I remember the life of my Dad.

Dear Papa,

I wanted to take this moment to thank you for all you taught me.   I remember being afraid of you for the longest time.   It wasn't until I was much older that I learned from you the trauma that you dealt with growing up and the challenges you faced dealing with ignorant and racist people.  It's a wonder you kept on going.   But you had Mama and us 3 kids to think of.   I understand now the stress you dealt with and I see how we unintentionally added to it.   I can see why at times you would snap.

But I also saw a whole other side to you as well.   Your caring and vulnerable side.   You shared with me some of your hopes and dreams that didn't come to fruition.   I saw how prideful you were when I accomplished small milestones in my life.   And you were there to share your wisdom during those times I didn't reach my goals.

Some of my greatest moments was working with you side-by-side at our church.   Being the building manager brought its own sets of challenges.  I saw how you dealt with everyone wanting a piece of you and trying to tell you what to do or how things should be done.    You gave the church over several decades of dedicated service.   Your dedication and work ethic gave me a guideline to navigate my own career and work obstacles.

Well you made it to 92 years.   That's an amazing feat for a black man.   And I've said it before but it's also amazing both your older brothers also made it to their 90's before taking their last breaths.   I do hope you get to see them in the afterlife as well as your parents.

Most importantly I want you to give Mama the biggest hug and kiss for me.   You both made it to over 50 years of marriage.   I know she is waiting for you with open arms.   I still think of Mama everyday and now you are with her again.

I know you both will continue to watch over Tasha, Trina, and I for our remaining time on Earth.   I am hopeful one day I will reunite with you and Mama.   Until that day, know that you are in my thoughts now and forever.

I love you Papa!

Your #1 (Only Son) Eric

Broom Sweep

 In my last post I mentioned that I had a major life event that would be happening soon.   Well I am officially a married guy.    With everything going on with Dom's life in terms of his work crossroads and general health, we thought it would make sense to protect ourselves legally.   We also obviously married because we love each other.

So we decided to get married inside Marquette Park with a view of Lake Michigan.   The location was significant because we had our first official date and kiss inside of the park.   We only had a few select folks from our Church act as witnesses to our event (though the new Courthouse rules stated we didn't need witnesses anymore), in addition to our pastor.   I was nervous about the event being at the park since we were just doing a quick wedding and not renting it out.    The Park has a Pavilion that folks rent out.   Luckily where we had it didn't need to be rented out but it is a public venue so I was worried about wedding crashers. 

But thankfully we only had one crasher and he wound up being very respectful.   He actually reminded me of my brother-in-law Abe.    Dom wore a kilt for the wedding and Faux-Abe was bold enough to ask Dom about it.   He seemed to be a bit chatty too and was cheering when Dom and I completed the wedding ceremony.

So we treated the small wedding party to dinner afterwards at a local tavern.   Overall 07/20/2022 proved to be a great day for a wedding.

The next day after work, Dom and I drove to Peru, IN to attend the Peru Amateur Circus.   It's a two-week annual event that takes place in July.  The majority of the town residents either perform or assist in making the circus happen.   Dom grew up near Peru and had fond memories of going to the circus there.   He took me there once four years back so this would be my second time there.

After the show we went and got some elephant ears and a pork tenderloin sandwich.   The plan afterwards was to get a hotel.  I had wanted to reserve one ahead of time but Dom insisted we could get one along the way.   The plan afterwards was to head over to his older sister Marie and her husband Mark's place in Bloomington, IN.   Instead of a hotel he thought it was a good idea to call Marie after 11pm to see if we could drive straight there.   He had me dial but she didn't answer so I left a voicemail and we found a Super 8 to stay at that wasn't too bad thankfully.

I took off work Friday morning thankfully but I did log in quickly to check on some work stuff I forgot about.   We grabbed a quick breakfast at Mickey D's and then made our way to Bloomington.   Marie reached out to Dom also and we were able to get some general directions since they live in a newer constructed home and the address info was still not 100% accurate.

So the plan was to stay there until Sunday.  It would be my first time interacting with Marie on an extended basis.  From the stories I've heard about Marie from Dom and the rest of his immediate family, I was expecting things to be a bit awkward.   From my limited interactions with her in the past, she seemed a bit stuck up and mostly living in a small town the majority of her life, had limited interactions with black folks.

She does have her issues but she was nice to me and seemed to want to get to know me.   I guess that's all I can ask for.   It was interesting seeing the dynamics between Dom and Marie in action.  Marie's two years older than Dom and it seemed she was a terror to him.   I heard about how Marie tricked Dom into eating dog food when they were little and Dom wound up getting in trouble with their Mom.  Then there was the time she dissed him to get with the "in crowd".

Her husband Mark was a hoot.   He's like a big kid and is a practical joker at heart.   He was constantly trying to play jokes with us the entire time.   He tried to pawn off a fake $100 to us for Dom driving us to Spring Mill State Park.   

Overall it was a fun weekend.   It was almost like a mini-honeymoon.

What wasn't fun that weekend was my laptop deciding to give me the blue screen of death.  I had a lot of bad luck with this particular laptop since I bought it refurbished back in 2018.   It was a miracle I got almost four years out of it.   So I've been using an older ASUS laptop for the last week and a half that still halfway functions.   But I found a Lenovo IdeaPad that seemed to perfectly what I was looking for.   Also thanks to my work I was able to get a discount which bought my total cost under $500.  Cha-ching!

So here's to my first official blog entry on my new laptop.

Hating On The X

 I'll have to get back to more meaningful posts.   Actually I'm having a new life experience that is in the near horizon.    Something I never thought I would ever have happen to me.   I may have hinted about in previous posts.    But I'll share more later.

In the meantime this song that popped up during the credits of a show called The Chi (which by the way I can't believe this show is still on the air with their 5th season but then again I'm watching it so there you go...*LOL*) had me cracking up.   As you can tell from the title, it has to do with an ex.    I only have two official exes and thankfully I don't hate either of them.   I don't believe they hate me...*LOL*.   I doubt we even think about each other.   The most I thought about them is due to this post.   Actually it's amazing in my almost 50 years of living, I've only had three serious relationships.   Though it wasn't from lack of trying as my blog entries over the last almost two decades can attest to.  

But anyway this song titled 'Hate My Ex' had me rolling of the floor laughing though some of the lyrics are quite savage.   But it was the delivery that had me cracking up.    To keep up with current times, part of the lyrics mentioned hoping the ex catches "Corona".   They also berate most of their ex's family members and savagely adds "I hope when you get on a scale, it asks if you are a whale"... OUCH!   Now while I don't hate my exes, some of the losers I've befriended, dated and/or hooked up with over the years I definitely wouldn't mind dedicating this song to them.     Anyway it's my latest eargasm so I thought I'd share it on here.    See ya on the next post.