An Orange You Just Can't Peel

 Apparently the White House is saying there was yet another assassination attempt on Agent Orange.   This time the alleged incident took place Saturday evening at the White House's annual White House Correspondents' Association dinner.    It's interesting to learn the history of the dinner.   It was originated by former president Woodrow Wilson in 1914.   The purpose at the time was to protect press access to the president after rumors that politicians may limit which specific press members could attend briefings.

The irony in that is the current Orange administration has threatened to control which press members are allowed and what they can report on.   So the fact that they were even having the dinner in the climate they have created is shocking in itself.   

In the last few decades of the WHCA, it is tradition to have a comedian roast the president and the press.  As thin-skinned as Orange is, he would definitely would not be able to take any ribbing.  Just look at how he tried to get comedian Jimmy Kimmel fired a few months back.   In fact, Orange did away with that tradition by not inviting any comedians for this year's event.

Kimmel, not happy with Orange doing away with the tradition, decided to have a mock roast.   Orange and Melania were not having this, though.   Orange went so far as to accuse Kimmel of playing a part in the assassination attempt.

Let's back to the attempt.   The WH is saying that a lone gunmen somehow was able to breach security and the president's life was in danger.    There are various videos showing the VP being escorted out first and later the president tripping on the floor as secret service went to take him out of imminent danger.   Other pictures show various Orange advisors like Stephen Miller hiding behind a pregnant spouse.  Incidentally some astute observers couldn't help but notice Orange watching backstage.  If he was in any real danger, wouldn't the secret service have him out of sight in some barricaded room?

Other hilarious videos showed an old man sitting at the table that was unbothered by the commotion and continuing to eat dinner.   Yet another showed a lady grabbing all the alcohol for a post-drink party in a nearby hotel.  

The only thing is later reports say that the gunman was on a different floor.    So Trump was not in any immediate danger.    The lone gunman himself was not shot but a service member was shot though protected by his vest.   Later reports say that he wasn't shot by the gunman but rather another secret service member in friendly fire.    What a shitshow!

So needless to say a lot of folks are calling the attempt a hoax that was staged (like the other Orange attempts).   Adding fuel to that fire is that less than an hour after the alleged attempt happened, Orange was holding a press conference and everyone was all smiles like nothing ever happened.   In the press conference, Orange was demanding his ballroom plans resume as the incident would not have happened if it was in his ballroom.   And this is the current state of the United States!    You can't make this stuff up.   It will be interesting to see what happens with the lone gunman.

Ready For The Kink

 

Nothing much major is happening.   I told Dom about his being served.   It ended up he had received other notices as well so it wasn't much of a surprise.    We went to his health portal billing section and saw that he had some bills that were listed as being sent to the debt collectors.   The total amount was less than half of what the debt collector said he owed and traced back to 2024.   A part of me was wondering if the debt collection is older debt maybe from 2023 and earlier.   Who knows?

We decided to pay (well I used my charge card) a portion of the debt.  I will pay another portion next month.   My card debt is depressing me again but I am remaining a cycle ahead for now so as long as I pay the statement balance at least I will avoid paying interest.

We're also deciding to chance not going to court.   As I alluded to before Dom is not working anymore and doesn't plan to.   So odds are they won't be able to garnish any wages since there are none.   Also Indiana is not a community property state so they can't sue me for it.   The worse they can do is freeze our joint account and his personal account.  But he barely has any money in that account and I only keep it afloat to avoid overdraft on the mortgage. Since our mortgage is tied to the same bank, I will go with the plan to open a separate savings account in my name only so I can continue to pay the mortgage easily.

On the bright side, my long suffering stock Blackberry has finally started making some strides.   The price started rising from $3.50 to well over $5 starting on April 9th.   I sold 10% of my retirement shares at $5.68.   The price has cooled back for a bit and is hovering in the $5.20 - $5.40 range but I'm hoping it'll reach another leg up by the time Q1 2027 closes which should be by end of May.   I'm holding my non-retirement shares for a higher price, ideally $10 or higher.  I've been in BB stock since May 2020 so it's gonna be six years.   So may that'll help me pay off some more of the debt.

As if I need more debt but I purchased theatre tickets for us to see the show Kinky Boots during their Saturday matinee show on June 20th.   Dom's birthday is on the 23rd.   So the show is sort of his birthday present.   We recently watched the movie again and it looks like it'll be a fun show.   So that'll be our first summer activity.    I still want to get him a popcorn maker that he'll hopefully use instead of cooking it in my steel pot.   

We were also talking about going to Dollywood this summer but I feel like that may have to wait since we're also wanting to remodeling our bedroom and get a new bed this year.    The bed will be between one to two thousand and the remodel may cost just as much.    The bedroom has ceiling panels that are falling off so it definitely needs the remodel.   I've started removing some of the panels but Dom and I need to clear out the million or so dolls that are stationed all over the room.

I'm grateful our cars are hanging on even though Tasha was hinting on wanting my car last Christmas.    But I really don't want or need another car note and I don't have enough saved for a down payment just yet.   Of course Blackberry may surprise me in 2026 which would help me greatly.    We shall see.

We've Been Served

I was working from home this past Wednesday.   It was a normal day dealing with crazy customer cases and Dom was slowly waking up to get his quiet day at home started.   He had some doll orders that he was expecting from the Disneystore that was set to arrive that day.    Those arrived mid-morning just when he was downstairs in the basement taking pictures of more of his dolls.    His latest craze he was photographing were characters from Netflix K-Pop Demon Hunters.   These days any cartoon can quickly become Dom's next latest obsession.   Hemingway UPS rang the doorbell and since he was occupied downstairs, I went to pick up his packages.   

When I opened the main door, I saw there were some folded papers that were stapled and wrapped in a rubber band that was wedged between the screen door.    I first bought in his packages (two big boxes) since it was slightly drizzling outside and didn't want them to get wet further.   I then went back and grabbed the papers.

The first thing I saw was "Notice Of Claim" written in big capital letters on the very top of the page.  As I looked further I saw that Dom was served from the local Sheriff's office regarding a claim from his hospital that was sent to collections saying that the collector filed a motion with the Sheriff's office and Dom's court date is scheduled for 05/11 at 1pm.   

As I looked through the pages I was wondering if this was something we needed to worry about.  I saw what looked like a docket number and then a mention of interest owed for the debt in the amount of over $1100 dollars which along with the $115 filing fee and the principal balance of $4300 totaled approximately $5600.   I verified on the court website using the docket number that it was indeed filed with the court.

I haven't told Dom about it yet but he has received plenty of letters in the past from debt collectors which he's brushed aside.   I'm not sure he can ignore this one though.   I used ChatGPT to get some advice on what should be done.

The suggestion was to send a reply to "deny what debt that is uncertain" which they say forces the plaintiff to present proof.   The reply should include such phrases as “I lack sufficient knowledge to admit the amount” and/or “Plaintiff must prove the debt and amount”.    Doing this they say prevents a default judgment from occurring though that assumes that a court appearance is still made.

According to the advice, it is suggested that the defendant appear in court on that day where things may lead to payment discussions, future court dates, and the burden of the plaintiff to prove that the amount owed is correct.

It's also suggested to try and negotiate a lower payment amount.   It's also advised when filing to send it in person and have it stamped.

The scary thing is that I didn't even hear the person when they left the papers.   I had to check my security doorbell and it showed clearly a black sheriff's car parked in front of our house with a female police officer walking and placing the papers.

I've spoken about it before but I find myself frustrated with Dom's priorities.   His focus always is on what next doll he has to own.   When he was working his small paycheck was usually always spent on doll related things.   The only other thing he would think about getting is groceries.    It left me responsible for covering all the household expenses and other miscellaneous expenses like car insurance, car repair, our entertainment like dinners, plays, concerts, road trips, and other random life expenses that come along.

Now that he's not working, I'm responsible for paying for all of his orders.   You would think not having a job would stop him but I guess as long as I'm around he doesn't care.   He's had several visits and procedures over the years so the total amount could be for everything over that time period.    It never occurred to him to maybe set aside some of his doll money to pay his medical bills.   I've tried to pay for some stuff here and there but I can't be responsible for it all.  It's very upsetting to say the least and his expenses have been slowing down my progress on trying to be more financially independent.

He still hasn't completed filing for disability which he was supposed to do in January.  I wish I could strike from paying his bills but unfortunately he's using my credit cards so I'm stuck having to cover.   I mentioned not being able to pay off the full balance every month.   The upside is right now I am a cycle ahead but if some emergency comes where I have to pay extra, it won't take long before I find myself owing interest again.

I wish there was a way I can hammer home to him the importance of being financially responsible.   But he's about to be 62 and if he hasn't gotten that lesson in his younger years, he won't get it now.  I implore single people to choose their future partner wisely.   I suppose better yet don't get married...LOL.  Your spouse can either be an ally or adversary in your financial goals.    Dom is definitely in the latter category.   I am doing okay but I know I could be doing much better.   

I am trying to brace myself for telling Dom the news and trying to convince him to take it seriously.   But Dom is so lackadaisical about anything that isn't doll related.   He will probably brush this aside too.

The one upside is Dom is not working anymore so if they try to garnish his wages, there won't be able to get anything there.    Also they can't garnish social security or disability (if he ever gets it).   They can freeze his accounts and our joint account which is why I am looking to open an account in my name with Centier so I can continue to use that to pay the mortgage.    Speaking of the mortgage, the lien is in my name only so they won't be able to add a judgment to the house.

Another bright side, he actually sold one of his dolls and got over $300 for it.    If he could sell a dozen more, maybe he can pay some of this debt.

So maybe he should ignore it?   Lord know he's ignored everything else.   I don't know.   What a mess to be in.

I Could've Been Your Cellmate

I was viewing my old blogger entries and came across my Preach It Papa thread.   That thread was an ode to Papa and how I was trying to listen to him more.   I reminisced on how Papa used to put the fear of God in me to the point that I pretty much avoided a lot of the pitfalls that teenagers typically find themselves in.   I also mentioned how I almost could've been in jail.   I mentioned how I'd have to share that tale sometime in a later entry.   I saw that I never did post that tale.   So twenty plus years later, this is the entry.

My near jail experience happened in the summer of 1991.   I was 18 going on 19 and still was relatively wet behind the ears.    I was friends with another teen that attended my family Church.   Marco and I both were altar boys in Church and became fast friends (though we only interacted with each other on Sundays).   

I worked summers at the Church since I was nine years old.   I remember the reason I started working there was because Mama asked Papa to get me out of the house because I was fighting with Tasha and Trina.   I didn't learn to appreciate it until years later as it gave me time to spend with Papa.   It wasn't all smooth as Papa could be difficult but I'm digressing from the main point of this entry.

So the Church had their annual Vacation Bible School event that cumulated over one week.   As part of that event, Papa was given the task of giving the teens (and some of the adults) jobs to do in the Church.   Papa and I both hated that time of year because the teens were unruly and the adults were no better.   So in 1991, Marco was one of the teens that worked with us.   I convinced Papa to keep Marco longer as he was one of the better workers.   So he wound up working with us for a bit past the VBS period.

Hemingway one Saturday the Church had some kind of dance that I believe was sponsored by our Church's local Knights of Peter Claver Chapter.   Being the awkward teen and now at that time young adult, the last thing I wanted to do was go to a dance.   Marco, however, had an idea of somewhere we could go but use the dance as a cover.    The plan was for us to meet at the Church and he along with another friend of his would drive to Windsor to visit a strip club there.

As I reminisce about this now I have to laugh thinking about me being in a strip bar giving women money.  Actually years later I would wind up going to a strip bar in Chicago with a former co-worker of mine and losing my lady stripper virginity there.    That was sometime in the early 2000's where I was still trying to figure things out and hadn't gone down the path where I was exploring my attraction to men.   That wouldn't be until Halloween 2002.    But that's for another post.   (Ha...see what I did there?)

I needed to borrow Papa's car to get to the Church that night.   It was easy to tell him that I was going to the Church.   It wasn't a complete lie.    He let me borrow the car.

So I get at the Church and I'm sitting around waiting for Marco and his friend to show up.   It goes on an hour or two and there's no sign of them.   We didn't have cellphones back then.  There was a payphone inside the Activity Center where the event was being held.   I had some spare change and called Marco but he didn't answer.   Now that I think about it, if he was out I wouldn't have been able to reach him.   But I wasn't thinking of that.   I waited a little bit longer and after awhile I drove back home.   Man I was so square, I probably could've made my own entertainment but remember I was socially awkward (and there wasn't a casino back then I could go to...though I wasn't a casino whore back in 1991 either).   So the thought of entertaining myself somewhere made me uncomfortable.

Needless to say I was pissed.   Marco came to work Monday and I let him have it.   It was then that he told me why he was a no-show.    He mentioned that his friend wanted to stop at a Detroit club beforehand for some drinks and debauchery.   The friend took interest in a girl that was already taken by another guy.   A fight ensued between the guys and their friends so Marco had to step in and wound up fighting as well.    The police were summoned and Marco and his friend wound up being arrested.  He wound up staying in jail overnight.

Originally Marco said he wanted the friend to stop at the Church and pick me up before going to the Detroit club.   But I guess the club was closer than the Church so the friend didn't want to do so.   That decision saved me from ending up with the same fate.   First off I don't know if I would've been fighting as well.  I probably would've been like Joan Clayton in that one episode of Girlfriends where the ladies go in the club and when Toni gets in a fight with another patron, instead of getting in the fight as well, I would bring out band-aids afterwards.   That didn't fly with them as women, imagine me as a guy doing that.  That definitely would've had me being called all kinds of f-words.    Second I could not imagine myself being in jail and then having to call Papa to come bail me out.   Papa so would've killed me.

Papa's reputation preceded him and even Marco was saying he was glad I wasn't there either.   He knew that Papa would've had choice words for him as well.   So after hearing Marco's story I was no longer mad.   Sadly not longer after that week, Marco wound up quitting the job because Papa and he exchanged words over something that I can't remember.    But that is the story of my near jail experience.    Who knows how my life would've changed had I experienced that?   Thankfully I will never know.

Raging Roadsters

 What is it when some people get inside their cars that turns them into complete lunatics?   They drive too slow, too fast, weave in and out of traffic, and worse of all tailgate.  It gets to the point that it's scary these days to even go for a leisurely drive which is never truly leisurely.   Every trip leaves the potential for running into one (but usually more) of these lunatics.   I breathe a sigh of relief every time I make it safely to a destination.   When Dom worked at the school, he made it a point to email me to let me know that he made it safely.   I in turn do the same when I make it to my job downtown safely.

I have so many examples of raging roadsters that I ran into.   My most recent example was a few days ago.   I was coming home from work a little earlier Thursday afternoon to try and beat some inclement weather that was forecasted .   Thankfully 95% of my trip is via train (if I'm not traveling to Indianapolis which thankfully I haven't done in six months or so).   But I do drive to the train station.  To get out of the station, one of the exits I go to I have to make a left.    There is no traffic light at the exit and there's no stop signs for the main road.    There's only one lane to enter and exit so if you're making a left and someone behind you is making a right, the person behind you is stuck until the person in front can safely make a left.    It take forever (probably 5 minutes in actual time) to make that left as by the time traffic clears on one side, there's traffic on the other side.   Then it repeats until you have to either take a crazy risk and speed ahead of upcoming traffic or get lucky and catch a rare break where traffic isn't appearing on either side.

Knowing this I try to wait until everyone in the parking lot leaves before me so I don't have anyone behind me.   This past Thursday one of the people fooled me into thinking they were staying behind much longer but as I was heading towards the exit, they were backing up.   So they wound up behind me.   

It was raining currently so I didn't want to squeal out as I was afraid of hydroplaning and losing control of my car.    Unfortunately traffic was coming from both directions and there were times when one side was clear and the other would get traffic.   After two minutes I decided to step out on the left side of the road when I saw that traffic was gone on that side.   There were multiple cars still coming from the right side so I couldn't turn.

A minute later there was a car speeding on the left side coming towards me.   I heard him honking and the driver was not slowing down.   There was a final car on the right side that barely got past me and I was finally able to make the left just as the speed demon crossed my lane.    That person wasn't planning on stopping and I could've been side swiped.   Even if he did, with the wet roads it would've been harder to stop.   I definitely thanked my lucky stars when I got home (two minutes later).    I look forward to the warmer weather when I can start walking to the train station again.   I just have to watch for the lunatics when trying to walk across the street...LOL.

Another example that comes to mind is three Saturdays back when Dom and I drove to Four Winds casino in New Buffalo, MI.   There's a point in the trip when the two lane road that we're on merges with another major road coming from the East.    We're on the left hand side and the traffic we merge into is on the right.    There's a stop sign where we have to stop and take turns crossing for the other traffic that merges West for the second road.   

So I was crossing over and merging into the road along with another car that was on the right lane.    We both are in two lanes on the merged road.   An idiot coming from the second road going East is driving super fast and is quickly tailgating me.   I can't move over safely since the other car is on the second lane.   The idiot moves into the other lane behind the other car now tailgating that person.    There is a car a half block in front of me that has his turn signal making a left.   I'm guessing idiot driver was anticipating I would have to stop and they can merrily zip into the left lane once they're past the turning car.   But the turning car was able to turn before I got there.    

So I kept driving and idiot driver was still tailgating the other person.   I managed to get a good distance from both cars.   I then saw the idiot driver get in my lane.   Knowing that he was going to zig zag, I thought I'd save him the trouble and safely move to the right lane.

So then he speeds along but not without gesturing the finger to me and shouting incoherently before speeding along.  I immediately honked my horn to let him and everyone else know what an idiot he was as he continued speeding and weaving around other cars.   I guess he was in a hurry to get his weed at one of the over 30 weed dispensaries in New Buffalo.

That's just two examples of the many encounters I've experienced while driving on the road and Dom of course has had his own share, some while I was a passenger as well.

It truly is scary driving on the roads these days.   There are so many stories of road rage incidents where people end up fighting or getting shot.    I thank goodness that it hasn't gotten to that point in my encounters (knock on wood).    But it's just one more thing that we have to deal with in this life.

Unhealthy Health Care

One of the things that worries me every so often is health.   It's something that isn't promised and can easily change for the worse.   I only look at Dom who I remember when we first dated back in 2014 had so much energy.    He used to walk so fast and over the last few years his energy has dipped and he now needs a cane to walk and was diagnosed with degenerative bone loss.

I think of my parents who both were taking blood pressure meds for many years.   My Dad had many health scares over the years including prostate cancer and diverticulitis.   My Mom was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease which affected her mental state and sadly an aggressive form of cancer took my Mom's life.

The cost of health care is a nightmare in the U.S. and is one part of the equation that you truly can't prepare for.   You can save all the money in the world but if your health goes south, it can easily wipe you out financially.

It's such a racket.  Health insurance is a necessary evil but it amazes me how much the hospital charges the insurance companies.    A bill of $10000 may be reduced to $2000 due to insurance reduction.   But the various charges the hospital charges are outrageous.   $3000 for a couple hours in a room, hundreds of dollars in nickel and diming items like bacterial soap and different meds given. And whatever they can't get from insurance, they try to get from us the consumers.

But if you don't have insurance it's even worse.   When I had my bout of kidney stones, I didn't have any insurance at the time because I was working part-time at Amazon while skilling up for a job upgrade and struggling to find a higher paying job.  I couldn't get on Dom's insurance because we weren't married at the time and while there is an option for domesticated partners, Dom was not out at work.

When I was at the ER I had to explain (while I was in pain mind you) that I did not have any insurance.  I remember being told I made "too much" at my minimum wage job to qualify for any assistance.   I was too rich but not poor enough in the government's eyes.

It took two to three months before I got billed which wound up being close to $5000 which was reduced from $8000 (I guess cause I didn't have insurance).   This was all for 6 hours at the ER.

I was blessed by that time with a new better paying job so I wound up putting myself on a payment plan paying around $400 a month until I paid off the big bill.    And that didn't count the separate nickel and diming bills I got from the specialists directly which were between $50 - $200.

In contrast it was illuminating hearing about a nomad couple's experience in Malaysia.  In their video they mentioned how the wife had to have major surgery.   Mind you she went to the hospital because she was experiencing pain and was trying to get a diagnosis.   To her surprise the doctor said she would need to have surgery right away.  Everything happened within the same day.

She was in the hospital for a few days and they were bracing themselves for the bill.   But to their surprise it wound up being some low amount (I believe it was several hundred dollars) and they wound up paying it out of pocket because they had a high deductible that wasn't met.

It seemed like the quality of healthcare was much better in Malaysia for a fraction of the cost.   They mentioned there are insurance companies that provide coverage for nomad travelers, which are folks that move from place to place without a permanent house.   The one they talked about is called Safety Wing, which specializes in providing insurance for those without a permanent home.

The couple featured in the video are nice folks who were able to early retire and apparently lived on cruise ships temporarily and now travel and live in various locations.   They were in the Middle East during the beginning of the war Orange caused and spoke about managing to get away from there.   There were many folks who couldn't get out because the airports were limiting flights because of the fighting.

But healthcare has been a sore spot in the United States for decades.  Former President Obama was the closest to try and fight it with the Affordable Care Act.   Unfortunately even that fell short as premiums were outrageously high at times and it seemed the government was penalizing folks if they didn't have insurance even if the cost to get it was so high.    I remember trying to look into it but giving up.

I really don't know what to do about healthcare.   I can't see Dom and I being nomads either.   First of all he has too many dolls that he would need to sell or give away.   Plus there is something to having a steady place that you can call home.   There's another Youtube nomad couple with a channel called Stepsof2Foreigners about two hot gay guys who fell in love with each other.   Their channel has been around since 2017 and follows their multi-year journey from first meeting each other in Brazil (I believe Adam was on vacation in Brazil and met Bernardo and they basically decided to make a go of it).  I watched their videos over the years and it was crazy the number of places they moved in and out of in that time.   They spent the majority of their time in the U.S., got married, and Bernardo finally getting his U.S. citizenship but both deciding to now relocate back to Brazil.   Given this current regime I can't say I blame them.   That's one good thing about not having a home, you have no real ties to stay in a particular place.   But I wonder what their healthcare situation is.   I don't remember if they discussed it particularly but I know they've had a few health issues they had to deal with.

Plus it was dizzying all the constant moving.   I will say that I love stability and the thought of having to move somewhere once every six months to a year (which they seemed to be doing for many years) is something that would stress me out.   As I said there is something positive knowing that you have a place you can go to that is yours and is a refuge from the crazy world we live in.

I guess I should count my blessings that I have some kind of insurance, as broken as the healthcare industry is.

Praying For Peace

I came across this video randomly in the Youtube rabbit hole about a black American man and his trip to Iran.   It's very timely given the current war that Orange and his regime has started.   From watching my various independent new sources, the attack on Iran is something that Israel's Benjamin Netanyahu has been wanting to do for decades.   Netanyahu has been seeking U.S. assistance from various presidents over the decades and apparently finally found his in through Orange.   The theory is that Netanyahu blackmailed Orange into attacking Iran due to having incriminating evidence on Orange's involvement with Jeffrey Epstein.    The war itself is another distraction from people talking about Epstein.

The video I found followed a random man as he explored Iran.   Just like the rest of the world, the Iranian people have their hopes and dreams.    They are just trying to make the most out of the life they are given.   It is sad to see this knowing all the destruction that is happening in Iran now.    As a result of the war, the immediate effects is the increase in price on gas.    There have also been retaliatory attacks on the U.S., including most likely the attack on a synagogue in West Bloomfield, MI. 

Dom made an interesting observation.   He noted that the media stopped talking about Orange's orchestrated attacks on Venezuela which no doubt were done to steal their oil.    Dom feels he wanted Venezuela's oil in preparation for Iranian oil potentially being blocked.   

There have been so many different attacks on people with this current regime of marginalized folks including black and brown people as well as those in the LGB and especially T community.    I pray for peace in the world and that somehow we can find our way back from this fascism.   But I don't know.  It may be too late for us.

But anyway the video touched me and I wanted to share.

On a lighter note, today is Pi day.   Dom and I are supposed to be running errands later today.   Maybe we can pick up a pie somewhere.