The Heat, The Heat

 Toni Braxton - The Heat

Intro
Yeah
La-da-da-da-da, la, la
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Verse 1
Where's the sand, I'm set
My body? Thumping, going pitty pat
Getting tan and wet
And when I feel the beat, I lose control of it
Oh baby, I'm feeling you, I must admit
Looking tight and fit
And I imagine you and I in...

Chorus
Summer bodies shaking to the...
Music's going through ya
Can you feel the heat, the heat?
The heat is moving through your body
Temperature is rising
Can you feel the heat, the heat?

Verse 2
Sleeping in till noon
Been naughty, put bubbles in the swimming pool
Skinny dip for two
And as you feel the rhythm taking hold of you
Ooh Papi, I love it when you ooh-eeh-ooh
And I'm hooked, it's true
I imagine you and I'm in...

Repeat Chorus

This song used to be the bomb when Toni Braxton's album titled by the same name came out in 2000.   The song was supposed to depict the hot chemistry between two people that causes things to get hot.   But as I reviewed the lyrics, I couldn't help but laugh at the one line "Been naughty, put bubbles in the swimming pool".    Did the bubbles derive from some farting that was taking place in the pool?  That's definitely not sexy.   I guess as long as you're not pooping in the pool, all is good.   Maybe that's why the chlorine is needed.

Hemingway the song popped in my head due to the unseasonably hot and humid weather that's descended on Chicagoland this past week.    It's days like these that make me long for the central air I used to have in my first home.    When it reaches 100+ degrees outside, the house feels every bit of it.   I completely hate it.

Dom insisted on visiting his Mom this past weekend and wanted me to go.   I really wasn't keen on going but he kept pushing it.    At least he decided to drive this time which was almost a plus.   But his Mom's place was as miserable as ours and I couldn't get 100% comfortable, especially when I saw ants crawling freely in the home. 

While there Ava told me about a product for ants that can be placed outside to eliminate them around the home.   Something called Spectracide Ant Shield Outdoor Killing Stakes.   I honestly was not sure why she was mentioning those to me.   Maybe she's heard Dom talking to his Mom about my aversion to bugs.

I definitely do want to look into it since our area is plagued by ants and they have come inside the house as well.   I see that Terra has their own liquid bait stakes that they sell for outside.   I actually have bought the indoor ones before and they work so well that you stop seeing ants within 48 hours.   So I may purchase that one as well and start planting them along with some granules around the perimeter of the house.   Anything to keep those buggers at bay.

But anyway the heat has been so unbearable.  I feel stinky and sticky all the time.   Going into the office has been the worst as I wind up being sweaty by the time I arrive.    At least I can wash my face up a bit once I'm in the office.   Only bad thing I notice, the water reeks of the Chicago River smell.   But it makes sense since the water is coming from the Chicago River and our office is near there.

I've been noticing I've been pooping a lot more as well since it's gotten extra hot.   Dom told me that is normal when the temperature gets hot.    But I hope it stops.

Summer is definitely in full effect.   Unlike Toni's song, there's nothing sexy about this heat.   It's going to remain in effect for at least another week.   We did get a bit of relief Tuesday but the temps start rising again.

Speaking of the heat, my stock Blackberry has been heating up in the positive again.   They had an excellent Q1 2026 and their main product QNX is proving to be a short-term and long-term money winner.   Total revenue from QNX was 57.5 million which was up 8% year over year.  The price has been rising again from the ashes again as a result.   I try not to get too excited though because it seems BB just can't keep their price momentum going long.    But the company has also been buying back stock (so far they've purchased 10 million shares) which helps increase shareholder value.   I'm very hopeful that I'm in the right horse and it'll pay off in dividends by the time I near retirement.

This post is officially a milestone post.   It's my 200th post since I've started my second blog.   It's not an overly impressive number considering I started this blog in October 2011, so almost 14 years ago.  I did have a six year hiatus where I didn't blog.    However I've made a lot of positive strides since starting up again in 2021 to try and post more about my life.   It's been nice keeping track once more on my highs and lows.     Here's to another 200 posts ahead.  With the pace I'm going, I hope to get there in another 3 - 4 years (God willing).    I'm grateful to continue to have a place to share my thoughts.   Till next time.

I Love Some Molly

When referencing Molly I do not mean the synthetic drug.    I'm referring to the actress by the name of Molly Culver.   I first was introduced to the actress on the late 90's guilty pleasure show V.I.P. that I used to religiously watch on syndication when it aired on the weekends.   The show featured Pamela Anderson as Val Irons who finds herself being thrusted in the world of bodyguarding after a random star meets her at a hot dog stand she worked at and invites her to a Hollywood premiere.   The star gets threatened at the premiere and uses Val as his personal shield.   To save face he tells reporters that Val is his bodyguard.   Meanwhile a struggling bodyguard agency which Molly as Tasha Dexter is part of somehow runs into Val at the same hotdog stand after they see the story on the Hollywood premiere.   They have the idea to hire Val as a figurehead in the hopes of reviving their dying agency which it hilariously does. 

Tasha Dexter is the no nonsense former KGB agent whose hobbies include gun shooting and sharpening her many knives.   Tasha and Val were often at odds with each other throughout the series.   Tasha would get pissed whenever the police would credit Val for solving cases.   Val is the happy go lucky character that dumbed her way out of many situations and the show often played into their frenemy relationship.

I grew to love Molly's character as the series progressed and Tasha quickly became my favorite character.    I even picked up one of her character twerks.   Whenever someone would refer to Tasha's background in the KGB and ask if it's something she picked up at the KGB, she would famously reply with the word "maybe" trying to be mysterious.   I would use that line a lot when Dom would ask me about stuff and I even got him using it to mimic me.

I've had a chance to reacquaint myself with the series since Roku TV has all the episodes available.   I remember being so bummed when the show was cancelled after it's fourth season.   But I imagine it got expensive to produce after a while.   They had a lot of celebrity clients guest star as themselves over the years including Jay Leno, Morgan Fairchild, Marie Osmond, and Erik Estrada (used to have a mad crush on him).

I believe what drew me to Tasha Dexter was her no nonsense approach to handling conflict.  She could hold her own in a bar fight.   Her dominant personality is what drew me to her as a gay man.   It's that whole complex I joked about in the past in my infamous Star Jones roasts.   Basically my attraction to Molly is due to her character's no nonsense personality.   Tasha was strong enough to take no flack from anyone but there was a shortage of eligible straight men that wanted to deal with the drama.

Molly Culver's career however didn't really take off after the show ended.   She's had very few roles after that and no breakout role which is a shame.   But she had her greatest role from what I read being a mother to her only child, a son Sonny.   

When randomly searching on Molly Culver, I came across a random site that hosted an interview that her son did on his Mom.    It's a voice recorded one that sounds like something that may have been done for a school project.

https://archive.storycorps.org/interviews/molly-culver-interview/

It was such a short and sweet interview where Molly reiterated that the most important event in her life was the birth of her son.   Towards the end she teases that she hopes Sonny has lots of grandbabies which reminded me of my favorite show Half & Half where Phyllis would tease Mona about wanting grandbabies.    Speaking of Phyllis and Mona, both actresses I believe had a reunion on a Netflix comedy Family Reunion that Telma Hopkins occasionally guest-starred on.   I still haven't seen the episode yet but I'm almost at the end of that series and I believe that episode is near the end of it.   It's a cute show though it's not one of my faves.

But I'm happy to see that Molly Culver seemingly is in a happy marriage and raised a family.  Her son was born in 2006 and is actually a young adult himself now.   Time does march on.

I'm so glad I'm able to watch V.I.P. again since they only released Season 1 on DVD years back.   I've been watching an episode on Saturdays and I get to share it with Dom...LOL.   Watching the show definitely takes me back to my late 20's when I was living single in my first home in the Northwest burbs of Illinois.   The whole cast had great chemistry but I'll always have love for Tasha Dexter.

Sunday Follies

 Dom as of late has not had any energy to do anything outside of staying at home.  His neuropathy has been pretty bad and it takes all his energy just to get upstairs and shower and get dressed.   He usually needs my assistance to put his socks and shoes on.   But Dom had a rare moment this past Sunday where he actually wanted to get out of the house.   He even suggested us going to the casino together where I can play some slots while he walks around the casino.

There was one catch though.   Dom does not believe in me losing money and is of the school that if I'm even up $10 I should leave.   I keep telling him that there is no guarantees of winning.   I would say 95% of my casino trips are ones where I've donated (nicer way of saying I lost money...LOL) to keep the casino's electric bills paid.   If I'm honest, it's closer to 99%.   Leaving with a decent sum of money is a rare thing and days like I had last Thanksgiving is extra rare.

It's rare that Dom accompanies me to the casino.   When he does, we're usually out of the casino in less than 30 minutes since he's bored once he makes his lap around the casino.   But I noticed an interesting thing when Dom goes with me.   It seems that my odds of leaving a winner increases.  Yesterday was no exception.   We went to the Four Winds Casino in New Buffalo, MI.   Pretty much these days it's the only casino I go to (mostly because the Indiana casinos are smoke filled and the Illinois casinos are money pits).   Plus Dom likes the layout of Four Winds better.

The first machine I went to called Brazil I was playing on $40 free play on.  I managed to get two bonus games on the machine and scored a quick $180 win on.   I moved around to a Wings Over Olympus game.   I have not had any luck triggering the bonus on that game at all in the last couple years.   I'm not sure why this time would be any different but I decided to give it a try.

Dom found me while I was playing machine #2.   At the time I was up $160.   I knew the minute he found out I was up he'd want to leave.   He didn't disappoint.   I was able to play it down to $150 without scoring a significant hit.   It was then time to go.   Dom is like my conscious sitting on top of my shoulder telling me it's time to go.

I will say I do not enjoy my hobby as much when he's with me but I looked at the bigger picture being grateful that he wanted to go out.    He wanted to check out the beach and possibly get a walk in.  We weren't able to find free parking so we kept on going.

We were hungry and wound up stopping at Shoreline Brewery & Restaurant in Michigan City, IN for a late lunch.   I had an interesting moment when getting seated where I saw a gay couple sitting at a high table.   I caught one of the guys checking me out and then having the other guy check me out.   That guy didn't seem thrilled that his guy was looking at other guys and gave me a nasty look.   The two left soon after Dom and I were both seated.   Sadly Dom was oblivious to what was happening when I tried explaining.   Nonetheless it's nice to know that I still can occasionally turn heads.   I also had an encounter with another guy when I accidentally opened the door while he was coming out.   He was sadly straight...LOL.

We had a good dinner though the winner for both of us were their onion rings.   The batter they use on them is very good and crunchy.   It's quite thick and doesn't easily fall apart which is a plus.   Dom wanted an extra order which we took to go.   

Overall it was a good day.  I was glad that Dom wanted to venture out.    He wound up being tuckered out once we got home and napped the rest of the day away.    I may have drifted in and out as well.    It's so much fun getting old.

1st Of The Month

 

I remember when 1st Of Tha Month first came out in 1995, the radio stations would religiously play this song on the 1st of every month.   Of course they played it every day after that as well.    I will admit Bone Thugs N Harmony made some great jams but I struggled to understand every spoken word they said since depending on the artist, the enunciation wasn't clear.

Nonetheless the "first" 1st Of Tha Month since it's release was September 1st, 1995.   It was actually my first 1st living in the Washington D.C. area.   I was newly living on my own in my first apartment.   Sally was there along with Blanche, whom I talked about in a previous blog entry, and was our 2nd Mama while out there.   

I remember waking up to 1st Of Tha Month playing and it hit me especially when the day actually was the 1st.   Each month does give us a new "starting point" to begin anew with new and existing goals for the given month and year.   At that time I was struggling with my new role and learning about the expectations the client "Bell Atlantic" had for us.

With each subsequent 1st of the month, things got better and I was able to navigate through different obstacles that were thrown at me, mostly from the first company I worked at.   I still remember when my initial contract with Bell Atlantic ended, I used that time to travel back to Detroit and purchase my first car (a 96 black Chevrolet Cavalier).

When projects ended we were in a phase called being "on the bench".   Consulting companies in the 90's used to still keep their consultants between projects and paid them.   You would use the bench time to train and interview for other roles.   These days consulting companies place you and pay for you while on projects (if you get the job after interviewing) but once the project ends, you no longer were considered an employee of the consulting company and would have to start over again.   It's almost like you're a free agent with no support.   I experienced that first hand during my brief 6 month role in 2018 after being laid off.   I was disappointed that the consulting company didn't reach out to me at all during my time to possibly present other roles.   I didn't realize how good we had it in the 90's even in the midst of all the bullshit.   

But anyway while I was in Detroit, the project manager called me and wanted me to interview for a project in some other state that I don't remember.    I had to tell the project manager that I was Detroit which I remember she was peeved about.   She asked me if I had a suit with me if they were to pay for a flight to go to the interview and I told her no.   She was so mad but she said okay as she quickly hung up.    I did end getting my car and then I drove it back to D.C.

That period in my life was crazy.   I was worried after that incident that they would fire me (they didn't).   I was so glad I had Blanche, Sally, and the other ladies that were in the same boat as well to talk to and get advice from about our various experiences.   It was a coming of age moment for me.   And no doubt 1st Of Tha Month was one of many different songs that came out during that time period that brought my levity.

Here's to a new month and at the end of it, half of 2025 will be behind us.    I'm hoping we're all one step closer to reaching or accomplishing our goals.

Moore Than Alright

 

Dom and I had a great time attending Chante Moore's concert in Joliet's Rialto Square Theatre.   The inside of the theatre itself was very beautiful with interior architecture that reminds you of what you'd see in Italy or Spain.   We had good seats near the front of the stage which allowed me to take some great pictures.   Dom hadn't heard much about Chante before even though I have played some of her stuff here and there over the years.   But he was thoroughly impressed and enjoyed the performance.   

Chante puts on a great show and her band also did their thing as at various points in the show as she gave her bandmates a chance to shine.   Chante sang a lot of her hits from her first two CDs and others from her other CDs (8 in total).   She also sang a couple songs from her forthcoming album which will be her 9th.   She also has two additional albums that she did with her ex Kenny Lattimore.

There was one song I prayed that she wouldn't sing called Bitter off of what I call her "attempt at being more urban" project Exposed.   I winced everytime she sang the N-word in her recording of the song.    But Chante knows most of her audience and did sing it.   But instead of saying the offending word, she had the audience sing it.   I couldn't bring myself to sing that but I was singing along to everything else she performed.   She also did snippets of other artists songs like Tevin Campbell's Can We Talk, Quincy Jones In The Garden, and El Debarge's All This Love among other songs.   Overall we really did enjoy the show.

The journey getting there was interesting as well.   Since the show was in Joliet, which was about an hour and some change from us, we decided that we would eat something beforehand.    Dom of course had a hankering for Chinese so to appease him I tried to find some places along the way that served Chinese.   I looked primarily in Matteson, IL since our route was mostly along Lincoln Highway.   

I found a place but surprisingly Dom turned it down after not liking how the food looked in pics.   So we decided just to do a random stop (which I knew would mean a fast food place but it was alright).   Dom spied a Subway and we decided to stop there.

We ordered our subs, I did a 6-inch and the bread looked like it was smaller than that.   Dom opted for the foot-long.   We decided to eat inside the restaurant.   Fifteen minutes into eating this "homeless" guy came in begging for change.   Dom immediately went into attack mode but I foolishly thought I would give him a dollar.    I didn't have anything but a $5 but of course the guy was like I have change.   So he puts change on the table and after I give him the $5 he proceeds to take the change back and saying that he's homeless.  

All I could do was laugh and say 'ok, you got me' as he proceeded to walk away.   I resigned myself to being conned but treating it as my "good deed" for the day.   Dom did try to stop it but I had to be foolish.  I saw the Indian folks in the restaurant looking in at us from the back area.    They clearly had that character come in before.   We also couldn't help but notice they had a bunch of chairs strategically placed to block direct access to the restroom.  I'm sure they've had issues before with non-paying customers wanting to use the restroom.   Needless to say that is the experience of doing and patronizing business in the hood.  

It also reminded me of how blessed I am.  I don't know if I would survive out here in these streets hustling to try to make a buck.   I am blessed that I managed to hold a job and was able to save and find an affordable place to live.  Aside from my blood pressure, my health is fine.   My old car is still running fine.  I don't take any of that for granted.

As we drove on, I was annoyed as I saw other places that we could've stopped at to eat that would've been better.   But the Subway did provide sustenance so it was alright.

Parking itself was another issue.   It was mostly street parking with a few garages sprinkled in.   After circling the streets a couple times, I decided to park at the local casino Harrah's garage.   I did freak out when walking out of the garage as I saw a sign mentioning towing cars away that weren't patronizing the casino.   But Dom told me it'll be alright.   I did feel bad because Dom and I had to walk a few blocks to get to the theatre and Dom isn't able to walk as quickly.   I did wind up walking back to get my car (which thankfully was still safely parked in the garage) and resisted the temptation to go to the casino.   I then picked him up from outside the theatre.

We decided to visit the IKEA in Bolingbrook the next morning so we stayed at a local hotel in Bolingbrook for the night.    I got us a handicap room so we had a higher toilet seat and wider hallways to make it easier for him to navigate around.

The next morning I went to pick us up some continental breakfast to enjoy in the room.   I got us some Belgian waffles and a banana which tided us over till we left for IKEA which was 15 minutes away.

Dom saw a Michael's craft shop in the same area as IKEA so of course we had to stop there first.   Well Dom did and I was along for the ride...LOL.   We then made it to the IKEA just after 10am.   There weren't too many folks thankfully as we went through the aisles and ultimately spending just a little over $200 on various knick knacks and snacks.   We even stopped for some Swedish meatballs and mixed veggies for lunch in their cafeteria.

We then made our way back home but not before I made a quick stop at a Sunrise Health store in Lansing, IL to get Ice Cream For Bears, a natural brand of ice cream that is only sold in a few select stores.    Then we made it home.   

Thankfully I have a day off from work for the Memorial holiday so that gives me one more day to relax before getting back to the work grind.

Future Mini E

 Sometimes I find myself reflecting on my life and I feel sad.   Don't get me wrong.   I have lived a great life with a mostly good career, decent finances, plenty of travel and adventures, and I did later find love with Dom.   But the one thing I did not have were children of my own.   A part of me wanted to experience the ups and downs of fatherhood and hope that I did things right with my kids.   Dom and I actually expressed how we wished we had met 20 years or so back.   He himself wanted to have a family but didn't have anyone to have it with.   But would we have been right for each other that time?    We'll never know.   But I do feel that we were meant to be in each other's lives one way or another.  I shudder to think how our lives would've been had we not met.

2002 was around the time I began thinking of kids.   Part of that was my guilt of being the only son and not having a male child to carry on the family name.   But at that time too I was just beginning to figure things out about my sexuality.   I remember doing research on different surrogacy programs and hearing about one in India that for $20K upfront and an additional $20K afterwards, provided an Indian surrogate who would carry your baby in her womb and then after the baby is born, you would have to go through the process of bringing your child back into U.S. soil.     One of the interesting (and prejudicial after I gave it more thought) options they had was that for an extra fee, you could opt for a Caucasian lady surrogate.   Heaven forbid a white person wants to have a Indian lady carrying their fetus.

The cost pretty much stopped me from going that route.   Plus I didn't have a partner at that time so I would have been the sole parent.   Had I still lived in the Detroit area, I may have thought about a bit more as I would've had my family nearby (though I'm sure my parents especially would have a thing to say about that option...*LOL*).  As an aside, I confirmed last year that my current company offers money assistance for surrogacy support if a person wants to have a child.    If only that was a thing 23 years ago when I looked at the surrogacy program.    Who knows if I would've had an adult child now?   Obviously now I'm past the point where I want to have the responsibility of caring for a child.   If I were to start now, my future E would be born in February 2026 and by the time they turned 18, I would be 71 or 72 years old (God willing).

The second time I recalled wanting to have a child was when I was dating Rock back in 2006.   Rock and I of course had other issues but I did discuss the possibility with him.   Rock was in his early 40's and in his mind he thought it was too late to entertain the thought of having kids.   That probably was a good thing too since we wound up breaking up in 2008.

I didn't give up on the dream entirely after that hoping that perhaps in a couple years I would find a like minded individual.   That never did happen.   I met Dom in September 2014 and when we discussed kids he told me that he was not looking to start a family as he was too old (early 50's...where I am now).   I decided that I may not find the right person and just see where things took us.   Almost eleven years later, it took us to living together (2016) and marriage (2022).

I don't regret it though once in a blue moon, I think of what could've been.   Once my sisters and I leave this world, our specific branch will officially end.    But obviously it won't be completely gone as my parents' siblings had kids who had their own kids (and I'm sure some of those kids may have a kid...LOL).   So barring the end of the world, the family name will live on.

But it got me thinking that I wanted to reach out to Sally and no_the_game (who I haven't chatted with in a while) to see if I could gift the children in their lives with a small investment in some stocks or ETFs that will hopefully appreciate in price by the time they grow up.    Sally is the proud grand-aunt of three beautiful grand-nieces and no_the_game has a handsome son that's about to turn 11.   It would just be a way of leaving a small legacy and perhaps by the time they're adults, the shares could turn into a car fund or help pay for groceries.   I would not expect anything in return.   But I think it would be a nice thing to do.   I'll have to save up some cash but I think it'll be a good thing.

To my future Mini E, I'm sorry that I didn't get to meet you in this lifetime.    But perhaps as Erykah Badu would say, maybe I'll see you Next Lifetime.

Wisdom Recovery

I don't have much of an update today.

I made it through the oral surgery and I officially have my remaining wisdom teeth removed.   Dom took me on the 5th and thankfully everything went well without a hitch.    One of the positives is that I no longer have the bad taste in my mouth with the cavities.   I took off this week from work to recover from the procedure and am currently on my last day.

I thankfully haven't had a lot of pain.  I'm just trying to take it easy and I've been watching many Youtube videos on how to survive wisdom tooth extraction surgery and have been trying to follow the rules as far as steps to a quick recovery.

So that means I've been eating lots of soft foods like soup, applesauce, cottage cheese, and ice cream.   I just introduced some slightly more solid foods like peanut butter and jelly to my diet.    My plan is to ease my way back into solid foods by next week.

The time off gave me some time to write to Mitch as well.   I received a letter in the mail from him yesterday expressing concern since I hadn't written him since last August.   I didn't realize it was that much time but I do remember that he called me on my birthday.    Then my intentions were that I would write him but then life was life-ing.   So time went by.   

I'm glad that I was able to write him.   I just need to mail off the letter which I plan to do sometime this weekend.

I also had a chance to play with my stocks, hoping to get rich.   That didn't happen but I did sell one of my stocks for a 30% gain and put a portion of that towards more Blackberry stock.   LOL I swear I hope that one pays off someday.   They did recently announce that they are looking to buyback shares which will hopefully help the price go up some.

I also will work from home on Monday as well before easing my way back to my schedule which involves me walking to and from the train station.   I want to make sure my body is ready for me to resume physical activity again.

So much fun.   At least I should be ready for my concert in two more weeks.