Farewell Papa

Around 2am EST on August 20, 2022, my Dad took his last breath in a hospital bed.   It was the conclusion of several months of repeated hospital and rehab visits.   My sisters and I had a meeting with the hospital staff (I did it over the phone since I wasn't in town) on Friday afternoon where we discussed the future care for my Dad.   Trina scheduled court time to seek legal guardianship for my Dad since he wasn't of sound mind and body.   That was scheduled for September 15th but alas is not needed anymore.

I had hoped I would get to see my Dad one last time and planned to travel today to see him.   I got the call from Trina around 1:40 CST time but I was asleep and didn't hear the phone.   I woke up around 4:30 AM and saw that she had called but didn't leave a message.   I knew then and there what had happened.   I visited anyway since I originally had a certification test planned for that day that I rescheduled to a facility in Michigan.   I didn't pass the test but it was my first attempt at a new Sales Cloud Certification so I wasn't phased.   I just wanted to be there with my sisters.   We three are the final line of our particular branch of the family but both my parents have (had) other siblings who have other lines that are continuing on so unless COVID, Monkeypox, floods, fires, and whatever else the world has in store for mankind wipes everyone out, the family name will continue.

Prior to my Dad dying, Tasha had shared a letter she wrote and read to my Dad prior to his passing.   It inspired me to write my own letter that I didn't get to share with him verbally but I plan to place a copy of it with him in his casket.   I thought I would share it here as I remember the life of my Dad.

Dear Papa,

I wanted to take this moment to thank you for all you taught me.   I remember being afraid of you for the longest time.   It wasn't until I was much older that I learned from you the trauma that you dealt with growing up and the challenges you faced dealing with ignorant and racist people.  It's a wonder you kept on going.   But you had Mama and us 3 kids to think of.   I understand now the stress you dealt with and I see how we unintentionally added to it.   I can see why at times you would snap.

But I also saw a whole other side to you as well.   Your caring and vulnerable side.   You shared with me some of your hopes and dreams that didn't come to fruition.   I saw how prideful you were when I accomplished small milestones in my life.   And you were there to share your wisdom during those times I didn't reach my goals.

Some of my greatest moments was working with you side-by-side at our church.   Being the building manager brought its own sets of challenges.  I saw how you dealt with everyone wanting a piece of you and trying to tell you what to do or how things should be done.    You gave the church over several decades of dedicated service.   Your dedication and work ethic gave me a guideline to navigate my own career and work obstacles.

Well you made it to 92 years.   That's an amazing feat for a black man.   And I've said it before but it's also amazing both your older brothers also made it to their 90's before taking their last breaths.   I do hope you get to see them in the afterlife as well as your parents.

Most importantly I want you to give Mama the biggest hug and kiss for me.   You both made it to over 50 years of marriage.   I know she is waiting for you with open arms.   I still think of Mama everyday and now you are with her again.

I know you both will continue to watch over Tasha, Trina, and I for our remaining time on Earth.   I am hopeful one day I will reunite with you and Mama.   Until that day, know that you are in my thoughts now and forever.

I love you Papa!

Your #1 (Only Son) Eric

Broom Sweep

 In my last post I mentioned that I had a major life event that would be happening soon.   Well I am officially a married guy.    With everything going on with Dom's life in terms of his work crossroads and general health, we thought it would make sense to protect ourselves legally.   We also obviously married because we love each other.

So we decided to get married inside Marquette Park with a view of Lake Michigan.   The location was significant because we had our first official date and kiss inside of the park.   We only had a few select folks from our Church act as witnesses to our event (though the new Courthouse rules stated we didn't need witnesses anymore), in addition to our pastor.   I was nervous about the event being at the park since we were just doing a quick wedding and not renting it out.    The Park has a Pavilion that folks rent out.   Luckily where we had it didn't need to be rented out but it is a public venue so I was worried about wedding crashers. 

But thankfully we only had one crasher and he wound up being very respectful.   He actually reminded me of my brother-in-law Abe.    Dom wore a kilt for the wedding and Faux-Abe was bold enough to ask Dom about it.   He seemed to be a bit chatty too and was cheering when Dom and I completed the wedding ceremony.

So we treated the small wedding party to dinner afterwards at a local tavern.   Overall 07/20/2022 proved to be a great day for a wedding.

The next day after work, Dom and I drove to Peru, IN to attend the Peru Amateur Circus.   It's a two-week annual event that takes place in July.  The majority of the town residents either perform or assist in making the circus happen.   Dom grew up near Peru and had fond memories of going to the circus there.   He took me there once four years back so this would be my second time there.

After the show we went and got some elephant ears and a pork tenderloin sandwich.   The plan afterwards was to get a hotel.  I had wanted to reserve one ahead of time but Dom insisted we could get one along the way.   The plan afterwards was to head over to his older sister Marie and her husband Mark's place in Bloomington, IN.   Instead of a hotel he thought it was a good idea to call Marie after 11pm to see if we could drive straight there.   He had me dial but she didn't answer so I left a voicemail and we found a Super 8 to stay at that wasn't too bad thankfully.

I took off work Friday morning thankfully but I did log in quickly to check on some work stuff I forgot about.   We grabbed a quick breakfast at Mickey D's and then made our way to Bloomington.   Marie reached out to Dom also and we were able to get some general directions since they live in a newer constructed home and the address info was still not 100% accurate.

So the plan was to stay there until Sunday.  It would be my first time interacting with Marie on an extended basis.  From the stories I've heard about Marie from Dom and the rest of his immediate family, I was expecting things to be a bit awkward.   From my limited interactions with her in the past, she seemed a bit stuck up and mostly living in a small town the majority of her life, had limited interactions with black folks.

She does have her issues but she was nice to me and seemed to want to get to know me.   I guess that's all I can ask for.   It was interesting seeing the dynamics between Dom and Marie in action.  Marie's two years older than Dom and it seemed she was a terror to him.   I heard about how Marie tricked Dom into eating dog food when they were little and Dom wound up getting in trouble with their Mom.  Then there was the time she dissed him to get with the "in crowd".

Her husband Mark was a hoot.   He's like a big kid and is a practical joker at heart.   He was constantly trying to play jokes with us the entire time.   He tried to pawn off a fake $100 to us for Dom driving us to Spring Mill State Park.   

Overall it was a fun weekend.   It was almost like a mini-honeymoon.

What wasn't fun that weekend was my laptop deciding to give me the blue screen of death.  I had a lot of bad luck with this particular laptop since I bought it refurbished back in 2018.   It was a miracle I got almost four years out of it.   So I've been using an older ASUS laptop for the last week and a half that still halfway functions.   But I found a Lenovo IdeaPad that seemed to perfectly what I was looking for.   Also thanks to my work I was able to get a discount which bought my total cost under $500.  Cha-ching!

So here's to my first official blog entry on my new laptop.